How Long Does It Take a Man to Know He Wants to Marry You?
Not long at all. A man knows that he wants to marry you within seconds of meeting you, if not sooner. He might have a few doubts here and there about whether or not the two of you are compatible enough for him to consider marrying you (he DOES need to make sure he’s making the right decision), but his certainty will become more and more apparent as time goes on.
Signs He Will Never Going to Marry You
He doesn’t move the relationship forward
If you haven’t moved the relationship forward – if he isn’t calling more often, hanging out with you more, or doing anything else to display his increased interest in you – then it’s likely that he isn’t interested.
He can’t stand being around your friends
If your guy always seems to have an excuse for not wanting to hang out with any of your friends, even though they’re all friendly people who seem excited about meeting him. The chances are that he isn’t very fond of them and never will be. Why? Because being around people who don’t like him is painful – so he’ll avoid doing it whenever possible.
He’s told you he doesn’t ever plan to get married
There are only three possible scenarios if you’re with a guy who says he doesn’t want ever to get married. One of these is that you’re the exception – and he’s just waiting for you to come around on the idea of marriage first. Another is that his feelings on the subject have changed since saying this, and now he plans to marry eventually. The third is that he was serious when he said it – in which case, don’t waste your time if you want to find someone who will feel differently down the road.
He has trust issues
Many men who aren’t interested in getting married (at least not anytime soon) have trust issues. If you ask about their history, they’ll probably tell you something like “I’ve been hurt before” or “I can’t deal with another broken heart.” Deep down, these men are afraid of getting involved with anyone for fear that she might leave them. They don’t want to open up their hearts to the possibility of being hurt again – so if they haven’t even talked about marriage yet, it’s almost guaranteed that he never will.
He is still dating other girls
If he has not dropped all of his other women and instead continues to keep them around in addition to seeing you, then there is a high likelihood that his heart may be elsewhere or that there’s something about you he doesn’t like.
He asks you to change
Last but not least, if he asks you to make changes (like spending less time on Facebook), it could be because he wants out of your relationship or at least on his terms. How do you know? Because being asked for this is a sure sign that the man in question feels resentful about something – and it won’t take long before resentment turns into disinterest.
He downplays the seriousness of your relationship
Now, this is not always easy to spot, but it’s a telltale sign. If you can talk about your future with him without him getting overly excited or enthusiastic. When he keeps things on the lighter side – when he makes fun of how “serious” things are sometimes – that’s because he doesn’t see himself with you down the road. For whatever reason, no part of him believes in what you have, and if he didn’t think it before, why would he ever change his mind?
You haven’t met his family
If you’ve been dating for quite some time now and still haven’t met his family, then he may have no intentions of ever introducing you to them. And if that doesn’t turn out to be the case (that is, if he does end up bringing you around). The chances are good that either something’s wrong with your relationship or there’s something about you that he doesn’t like or agree with.
He becomes defensive when you ask about the future
If he doesn’t want to talk about the future, don’t press it. But if you bring up the subject and he immediately withdraws or becomes defensive, then that’s a sign that not only does he not want to talk about it – but that you’re not on his mind when he thinks about what comes next.
He makes continuous excuses not to get married
If he’s trying to get out of marrying you, it will be like pulling teeth to try and convince him. Instead, what will happen is that he will make endless excuses every time the subject comes up. If this is the case, then don’t waste your time thinking you can change his mind – because he has already made up his own.
He refuses to talk about marriage or changes the topic abruptly
This is another sure sign he’s not ready to get married. So don’t try and force it – because instead of leading to a happy future, you’ll only end up creating tension or even losing him altogether.
You’ve been together for a long time, and no signs of proposing have been made
If you’ve been with your man for a long time and there have been zero signs about marriage, then that’s a sign in and of itself. Given the lack of trust or affection he has toward you (in general) and the fact that he doesn’t see himself marrying you anytime soon, it probably won’t happen…no matter how much longer you wait around.
He detaches from you emotionally
In general, it’s a good idea to watch out for any man who seems distant. If he starts distancing himself from you – emotionally and/or physically – then the chances are good that there is something incredibly wrong with your relationship or that he doesn’t want to be around you anymore.
He lives like a single man
A man who is not interested in marrying you will live as if he were single (or even as if he was with another woman). He won’t be making any moves to change his living arrangements or involve you more in his life. If this is the case, it’s a good idea to go your separate ways.
He proposes but then makes no additional plans
If you’ve been on the edge of your seat waiting to hear those words, and all he does is ask, or if you think it’s clear that he wants to marry you but never appears serious about it. The chances are good that something is wrong. While there could be some genuine hesitation as far as his part (he might not want to go down this road), there’s also a possibility that he doesn’t see himself with someone like you in the future, and “getting married” could be his way of ending things so both of you can move on.
You find yourself fighting constantly
If you constantly fight about the same things, he rarely seems happy (or even present) during the good times. Both of you may be ready to make changes. So if this is your situation, it might be time to stop trying to meet his needs and start working on yourself instead. If he doesn’t want to change himself somehow, he isn’t worth marrying.
He drops hints that suggest he doesn’t want to get married
When it comes to getting married, some men are sweet as all get out until they are asked. And if this is your man, you can expect him to behave in specific ways. So watch out for comments like “I’m too young,” “I don’t need a wife,” and other such hints…as well as excuses about why he doesn’t want to be serious with you…or even worse: why he doesn’t want kids or settling down.
He pushes back or pulls away when talked about wedding plans
One definite sign that there’s something wrong with your relationship (and that he will never marry you) is if he withdraws anytime the subject of marriage is brought up. If this is your situation, then it’s a good idea to back off and start working on yourself. At the very least, it’ll make you feel better in the end, and at best, he may come around later when he is ready for marriage.
He claims that he doesn’t know if he’s ready for marriage
If you can’t get him to commit (in any way) and he can’t make up his mind about what he wants, then it may never happen. And if this is your situation, don’t waste your time waiting around. He might realize later that he wants to marry you, but then again, he may not. So be careful with how long into the future you hold out hope for him and be sure that no other signs indicate that he is interested in making things work.
You have to keep dropping hints to remind him that you’re still around
If you have to keep reminding him all the time that you’re still interested in being with him and/or that you’re waiting for a proposal, then there’s a good chance he doesn’t see himself with someone like you in the future.
You can’t tell if he sees children in his future
If he cannot give any solid indication of whether or not he wants kids, and if your gut tells you this is an area where neither of your visions matches up, then it’s a good idea to move on. If this is a deal-breaker for you, you should leave now before getting more with each other.
He doesn’t want to spend time getting to know your family or friends
A man who truly loves you will try to get along with everyone important in your life, and if this isn’t happening, it may mean that there are significant compatibility issues between the two of you. And if he never even tries, then chances are good that there are already feelings of resentment at play here – which will make for a long and painful future if you’re both serious about marriage.
He doesn’t pick up on social cues
If he’s too daft to notice when you get all dressed up for a night on the town or that your time together is coming to an end (and that you’d like him to leave), then it’s safe to say that he has no interest in marrying anyone, let alone someone like you. And really, this is important enough not to ignore as it can be a sign of trouble ahead.
There is no sign of you on social media
If you want to know how serious he is about marrying someone like you, watch his social media accounts. If there are no signs of your being together on Facebook or Twitter or if there’s not even a picture where both of you can be seen smiling, then this is a good indication that he wants nothing to do with having an extended family for himself.
He doesn’t tell anybody about you
While some men are more private than others, any man interested in marrying someone will gladly go around bragging on his special lady at every given opportunity – especially if the woman in question isn’t all that well-known by people already. After all, it’s nice for him to have something to talk about that those around him don’t already know.
He doesn’t want to commit because he isn’t ready
If this is your situation, then it’s likely that you’ll be seeing signs of him making excuses for not getting married anytime soon (if ever). And if this is the case, then there are only two options here: either you change his mind or move on. If you’re more interested in having kids than him, then look for another mate.
You constantly feel insecure in the relationship
If your gut tells you that he’s not all that interested in marrying someone, then take a good look at how he treats you. If you can’t shake the feeling of discomfort or a constant stream of snags and gotchas then it may be time to go.
He never puts money into any joint account or savings
Is he always complaining about being broke even though he has access to his bank account? If so, then this may have something to do with past relationships – which means that this isn’t really about how serious he is about getting married. But if there’s something nefarious going on here (like him robbing Peter to pay Paul or other shady activities), then stay away.
He doesn’t try to make you happy
A man who wants to keep a woman around for what she can do for him isn’t going to be all that interested in making things go smoothly. He may even be looking for reasons why he shouldn’t give marriage a shot, in which case, it’s time for you to say goodbye.
What to Do When He Doesn’t Want to Marry You?
The fact of the matter is that if a man doesn’t make you feel like he’s “all in,” then there is no reason why you should stick around. And although we’re all for you staying single, we only want it to be because of your terms and not because someone has made you feel otherwise.
If he doesn’t even try to get along with essential people in your life or insist on showing affection, then the chances are good that he isn’t interested in ever marrying anyone. But if his lack of attention is part of a larger pattern, consider this: can someone who makes such poor choices maintain a healthy relationship?
And if the answer to this question is anything but an emphatic “yes,” then you may have to think about whether or not you’re willing to be the only one who is making efforts.
In other words, if there’s a lack of effort on his part and no signs of him changing, then it may be time for you to move on.
But whatever you do, don’t hang around waiting for him to want what you want – because if he doesn’t even know what that is, then how will he ever know when (or if) he gets there?
Should I Leave If He Won’t Marry Me?
The only reason anyone should stay in a relationship is that it’s what they want.
And if there are signs of him not making any moves to marry you, then this means that he doesn’t want the same thing.
On top of this, many men are just plain selfish enough to put their wants above yours without so much as an ounce of guilt. And when confronted with this possibility, some women will choose to stick around out of fear but shouldn’t you only have to be afraid of someone willing to follow through?
So if your worst fears have come true and it’s time for you to leave, then it isn’t too late!
After all, another man may come along and seem like the perfect choice, but if he’s not willing to make you feel special, then it might be time for you to go.
If you’ve ever wondered if he will ever propose to you, it may be time to leave. But whether or not this is something that should happen has less to do with the guy and everything to do with what you want in life.
So don’t stay just because you’re afraid of being alone. If another man comes along who wants the same thing as you, then nothing else matters!