If you work with someone and start developing feelings for them, it can be tough to handle the situation. On the one hand, if you’re attracted to a coworker, it’s perfectly natural; on the other hand, breaching your relationship agreement could seriously affect your career. The key is knowing whether or not you should be concerned about your relationship.
Many people get hung up on the idea that flirting is a clear sign someone wants to date you. But there are lots of non-relationship reasons people flirt with each other at work, such as:
Research has shown that men and women who spend more time together in the early stages of office relationships tend to end up in committed or exclusive long-term relationships. Spending more time together also increases the chance that you’ll notice when your coworker is flirting with someone else.
The line between innocent flirting and a full-on relationship can be very blurry, though, especially if one (or both) of you are married to other people.
Signs Coworkers are Attracted to Each Other
They’re Always Talking To Each Other.
If your coworker is always chatting you up about things that have nothing to do with work, it could signify that they have romantic feelings for you.
They Go To Lunch—all The Time.
Lunch is a great excuse to get away and talk about non-work-related stuff without getting into too much trouble. It can be a clear sign that your coworker likes you, but it could also mean the person has no social life outside of work.
They Bring Each Other Coffee.
Even if you’re both trying to be subtle about it, constantly bringing each other coffee is a sign your coworkers are not only attracted to each other but want the relationship to become something more.
They Are Always Around Each Other Desk.
Coworkers who spend a lot of time together tend to get comfortable with each other and develop romantic feelings. This is especially true if you notice your coworker is always close (by voice or physical presence) whenever you walk by their desk.
They’re Always Complimenting Each Other.
If all of your coworker’s compliments revolve around what they love about working with you, it could be a sign the person has romantic feelings.
The Smile At Each Other In Meetings.
If you catch them giving each other a little smirk when the boss isn’t looking, it’s time to start wondering.
They Walk Into Each Other’s Cubicles A Lot.
If your coworker is constantly popping their head around the corner, you know something is up.
Spending Time Together Outside Of Work.
Romantic feelings are hard to resist, so it’s not unusual for people who might not otherwise go out together after work to suddenly start doing so if they have romantic feelings for each other. If you’re spending time outside of work with your coworker, something is up.
Body Language Gives It Away.
There’s a big difference between having a friendly demeanor and being comfortable around each other. If you’re always touching each other — even if it’s just a pat on the back or brush of their hand against yours — then there might be something going on.
They Laugh At Each Other’s Jokes… A Lot.
Be careful not to make too big a deal of it, but if your coworker cracks up every time you tell a joke or share an inside joke, it could be because they like each other.
They Arrive At Work – And Leave Work – Together.
This is one of the most unmistakable signs that you’re dealing with more than just a friendship. Coworkers who arrive and leave together either have a relationship, or they’re really good friends — in which case it’s not unusual for them to spend a lot of time together in general.
They Tease Each Other.
If they’re always poking each other and joking with one another, there’s a good chance the coworker is romantically interested in you.
They Invite Each Other To Events Outside Of Work.
If your coworker invites you to happy hour or dinner after work, it could be because they have romantic feelings for you.
They Offer To Pick Each Other Up… For Social Events Outside Of Work.
If your coworker offers to pick you up before a social engagement outside the office, it’s a good sign that person might be into you more than just as a friend — especially if they seem nervous about asking.
They Look At Each Other – a Lot.
One of the most obvious signs that someone has romantic feelings for you is if they can’t seem to take their eyes off you. If your coworker stares at you whenever they think you’re not looking, it’s time to start wondering what could be going on between the two of you.
They Send Each Other Cute Emails.
If you find your coworker leaving you cute little notes on your desk (and they do not love notes for someone else), it’s a sign the person has romantic feelings for you. If they start sharing their personal lives with you, that’s another significant indicator your coworker is interested in more than just being friends.
They Touch Each Other A Lot.
If your coworker touches you — even if it’s just brushing your arm or jostling your shoulder in the breakroom — it could be a sign that person is into you.
They Have Inside Jokes.
If you find yourself in the middle of an inside joke with your coworker, it’s a sign they’re interested in more than just being friends.
It’s Obvious to Everyone But the Two of You.
If everyone around you can tell that your coworker is into you, it’s because that person is probably making their feelings known in some way — even if you’re oblivious.
Frequently Asked Questions.
* Do They Like Me As More Than a Friend?
If your coworker is really into you, there’s a good chance everyone knows it but the two of you. People who are romantically interested in other people tend to make their feelings known in obvious ways — even if the person they like doesn’t return their feelings. There’s a chance your coworker might be nervous about letting you know they’re romantically interested in you, but if everyone can see what’s going on but the two of you — it’s time to start paying attention.
*What Should I Do If My Coworker Likes Me?
If you find that your coworker is into you, don’t panic. You can let your coworker know you might be interested in a relationship with them — but only if you’re ready to handle the situation. If no one is going to get hurt, feel free to explore the possibility of a relationship with your coworker. But if there’s any chance someone could get their feelings hurt or left out, it’s best to keep things strictly professional between the two of you.
* What If I’m Not Interested In My Coworker?
You should always let your coworker know if you’re not romantically interested in them before they get hurt — even if it means having an awkward conversation with someone you work with. If you’re not interested in your coworker, it’s essential to be honest, and let them know, especially if you think the person might hurt their feelings later on.
* What If My Coworker Doesn’t Like Me?
If you find that your coworker doesn’t seem romantically interested in you, don’t be afraid to let that person know you’re not interested in pursuing a relationship with them. Even if your coworker is shy, there’s no reason you two can’t remain friends — but it’s always better to be up-front about how you feel.
If your coworker leaves you little notes, touches you, and has inside jokes with you — it’s probably time to start wondering if they might be romantically interested in you. Even if your coworker doesn’t tell you how they feel, the signs are all there for everyone else to see. If no one is going to get hurt, you might be able to explore a relationship with your coworker — but only if you’re ready for what it could mean.