It’s social, casual, and a great way to get to know one another (especially if you feel like there isn’t enough time in your busy schedule).
Sometimes, though, it can be hard to ask someone to hang out. It’s not always easy to get in touch with someone, and even if you do, you’re faced with the inevitable: what should we do?
Whether it’s your best friend or a crush, here are some great ways for asking a guy (or girl) to hang out:
How to Ask a Guy to Hang Out
Start By Feeling Things Out
This should come up naturally, but if you’re interested in a specific guy and want to ask him to hang out, it’s a great idea first to see how he responds to general questions.
You can say something as simple as: “Hey! What are you doing tonight?” or “What does everyone do for fun around here?” If the conversation is good, you can then try to gauge his interest level with something like: “So, if you’re not busy tonight, do you want to hang out?” Don’t be afraid to take it slow.
Don’t Be Afraid To Take The Lead
Sometimes, asking a guy out on a date can be nerve-racking. If you’re looking to ask someone specifically to hang out, avoid overthinking things, and don’t be afraid to take the lead in setting up plans (at least for the first few times).
Bring Up Your Last Date
If the date you went on was fun or exciting, bring it up in conversation! You can say something like: “Hey, do you remember when we went to that new Italian place? That lasagna was delicious!” This is a flirty way to give him subtle hints about hanging out later.
Remember Not to Bore Him
Asking a guy to hang out can be very casual, so try not to overthink it. It’s also vital that you’re not too vague or boring with your plans or conversation topics. While this person might be open to hanging out with you again, there are no guarantees if the date is dull.
Zero In On Their Likes & Interests
Knowing what this person likes can give you great conversation topics and show that you care. This is especially helpful if the relationship has recently begun or you don’t know each other too well yet. Use your resources (friends, family members, social media) to see if there’s anything he enjoys.
Pop The Question
There is no better time than the present if you want to ask a guy out. A simple: “Do you have any plans tonight? I wanted to see if you wanted to grab dinner with me” will do the trick. You can also bring it up before or after a planned activity – be sure not to interrupt anything important!
How to Ask a Guy to Hang Out Through Texting
Boost his ego a bit to get things started
Just like in-person conversations, a little ego boost will get a guy excited. Whether it’s a compliment on his physical appearance, a subtle reference to shared memory, or even admittance that he was right about something you said, getting things started with this is vital.
The worst thing you can do when texting someone you’re interested in plays hard to get. If you wait too long, the conversation might stall, and then it’s over before it even starts.
A great way to start a casual text conversation with a guy is by complimenting him on something specific that he did or said, e.g., “Hey, you made a really good point earlier and I wanted to tell you how much I agreed with you.” Or: “Hey! Thanks for your help earlier, I appreciate everything that you do for me.”
Keep the texts casual and brief
If possible, avoid sending multiple texts back and forth to get a hold of him. Keep it casual (he might be busy!) and make jokes if you’re looking to ask a guy out casually. If the conversation is going great, begin setting up plans for later in the day or even that night!
Keep it light and flirty (but not sexual)
If you want to ask someone out through text, flirtatiously referencing something that happened when you went out is a great way to start things off. You can also compliment his appearance or clothes. However, when texting with a guy you’re interested in, be extra careful not to send the wrong message by using sexual wording or innuendo too early on in the date. It might make him uncomfortable and turn him off.
A great way to ask someone out on a date is by treating them to something they enjoy. This is especially good if you already know something about their likes and dislikes. But even if it’s a new relationship, this will show that you’re looking forward to spending time with them – and want them to feel special!
Tell him you should hang out to gauge his interest
If you’re not sure if this person is down to hang out, tell him: “You know what? We should hang out sometime.” He’ll probably respond with something like: “Yeah we should!” and then you can follow up with a casual invite or set up plans for that day or night.
Ignore the “should”
Many guys are turned off by “should,” so it’s best to be cautious about using this word. For example, if you want to ask a guy out on a date and say: “You know what? We should go out sometime.” It might come across as not being sure if he’d say ‘yes’ to the date – and that might make him not want to go on one with you at all!
Wait for the right moment (and be persistent)
Waiting for the right moment is critical when asking a guy out. If he doesn’t seem too busy or distracted, then now’s as good of a time as any. If he says no, don’t give up – try again! And if it’s a ‘no’ for this time, but you still want to ask him out on another date, be sure to follow up with the right words. For example: “Okay, maybe next week?” or “We should hang out soon.”
Get straight to the point
When asking a guy out, whether it’s for casual or serious dating, it might be best to get straight to the point. You don’t need to beat around the bush with formal language – often, guys are turned off by this because it seems like you’re not comfortable enough. Just come right out and say what you mean! e.g., “Please go on a date with me.” or: “You know what? I’d like to take you out sometime. Is that something you might be interested in?”
Keep the tone casual
When trying to ask someone out through text, your words must be casually phrased but not too casual. Avoid using slang or excessive abbreviations if you want to make a good impression on him!
Also, be sure to type “you” instead of “ur” because it sounds more confident and mature, which are important when asking someone out. It can also come across as too condescending, which is not a good vibe.
Ask about his availability
If it’s a small commitment, asking about their schedule might not be necessary. However, if you’re looking to ask someone out on an official date, then it’s best to ask them what their availability is like. By starting casual with simple texts anticipating hanging out, you can gauge his interest in spending time with you and suggest accordingly.
Be careful about using sexual wording or innuendo too early on in the date. It might make him uncomfortable and turn him off.
Remember, if he turns you down after asking someone out through text, don’t get mad or upset! He could be having a bad day or feel awkward because of his shyness, so try to be understanding and not take it personally.
If he responds by saying he’s busy, then suggest a different day or time that might work for both of you. And if he says ‘no’ too directly without any hesitation, it might be best just to give up – there are plenty of other fish in the sea!
Choose something specific to invite him to
Instead of asking to “hang out sometime” or “watch a movie,” choose something he would like doing and ask him if he’d like to come along. For example: “Wanna go to the park on Saturday?” or “Hey you wanna catch a hockey game this weekend?”
If it’s someone you’ve been talking to for a while, it might be okay to ask them out on a date — but make sure you know how he feels about dating and starts slow. Introducing the idea of ‘dating’ might come across as weird to him if there hasn’t been much flirting between you two.
Be clear that it’s a date and not just hanging out
When you text someone, make sure to word your invite carefully and ask them if they’d like to go on a “date” instead of “hanging out.” This way, there won’t be any confusion about what it is, and if they are interested in dating you, it’ll make things much more manageable.
Keep it short and sweet
You don’t need to blab on forever about why you’d like them to come over. Keep the conversation lighthearted instead of deep and meaningful by sticking to quick and casual texts. There’s no point dragging it out if he doesn’t seem too interested or think it’s a good idea.
Make sure you’re giving them a choice
If you ask someone out by texting, make sure they choose the matter. If they don’t feel like going out with you, then there’s no point making plans since it’ll only end up as a waste of time for both of you.
Avoid being too ambiguous
If you’re asking someone out through text, it’s best not to use vague statements like “I wanted to know if you’d like to hang out sometime?” Don’t leave them hanging about what it is exactly that you want from them because they will most likely decline the invite; it’s better to make your intentions clear from the start.
If you’re hesitant to ask someone out in person, it’s best to be upfront about your intentions when you start talking to them. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve known each other or what kind of relationship you have; treat all potential relationships equally and make sure they know where they stand with you.